This week I’m thankful for… giving myself a break.

I had quite a few intentions and deadlines fall short in November and I’m actively allowing myself to not feel bad about them.

You know how I wanted to thank people every day in November?* I did it for two days. The two days before we got Franklin, on November 3rd. Since then, I’ve been lucky if my hair is washed and I make it to a meeting on time.

I also planned to launch a few new exciting things next Tuesday. But based on the load of work I have on my plate right now, it’s getting delayed.

Oh, and I also still have my Thanksgiving decor up. At this point I’m debating if I’ll do any holiday decor at all.

And you know what? That’s okay.

Have a great weekend and thank you for reading!

* Did anyone complete the challenge? If so, how did it go?!

As December quickly approaches, I’ve started to mull over my intentions for 2013. I don’t usually write my future letter to myself until the week before New Years but I like to contemplate those intentions early.

It’s also nice to reflect on how far I’ve come this year and look at what I’ve done well (work) and what has taken the back seat (friends).

So far I’m excited for next year to be about socializing, getting our puppy routine set, and developing my pretirement plan.

Some cool events will be taking place next year too including co-teaching a workshop at Alt Summit (more on that soon!). Mr. Lively and I would also like to plan a few trips next year and right now we are throwing out optional dates and destinations.

Over the next few weeks I’ll have a pretty good set of ideas floating in my head that will be relatively easy to put to paper in my future letter. So for others out there thinking about crafting their own future letters for 2013, feel free to get a head start by thinking and dreaming about them now!

Help!

I have been working with Franklin for the past three weeks and I have gotten 25% of what I normally get done. I thought that since I work from home that I would be perfectly suited to having a little pup by my side.

But the truth is that he chews everything he can find* (thankfully there isn’t much damage, his teeth are too small), he can get nippy when he’s wound up, and he barks when he’s bored/I’m trying to work/I’m not in eyesight.

Though I’m sure he will outgrow these tendencies as he gets older… the meantime is frustrating for us both.

The best thing so far I’ve found is stationing him with his harness and leash to the kitchen table leg where he has some roaming room near me but he can’t chew cables, curtains, or pee on the living room rug. Yet he’s constantly wanting to hang out with me (and eventually bite my hands) or get into trouble chewing something within reach.

I put him down for a nap in the crate in the morning and in the afternoon when I leave the house for a few hours for work. But other than those two crate naps, I am constantly untangling his leash from a chair leg, pulling the pee pad out of his mouth, or listening to him bark.

Also, he just hit the 12 week mark. So eventually it might be nice to send him to puppy day care a few days a week or take him on longer walks (he has a morning and evening walk)… but what do I do until then?

I thought I would be able to handle having him near me during the day stationed like I’ve been doing. But he is too high maintenance in this manner so far to make it effective for me – right now it’s ruining my productivity, patience, and sanity.

Anyone out there have any suggestions on how to survive as work-at-home business owner? What does crate training really look like? Almost all day?

Mr. Lively and I joke that I should be in a reality show called Pup Moms (like Dance Moms) where all I do is cater to the dog all day.

Because so far that’s what it feels like.

* He likes Bitter Cherry, jalapeno vinegar helps (but fades away), and a squirt bottle has been effective but difficult to time just right.

Though Jess LC has closed it’s doors, the ladies at Ampersand Design Studio have added three of our collaboration prints to their shop!

Purchase here just in time for the holidays.

via

Yes, yes, I have been talking a lot about Franklin and raising a puppy over the last week. It’s honestly because he’s been a huge new part of my life which is currently taking up a lot of my time, attention, and intentions as we get to know each other and establish a routine.

But I promise that he’s not going to be running the show here on the blog. I plan to continue to share a mix of life, home, and business intentions going forward.

However, today I’d like to share a few inexpensive cheap tricks I’ve discovered for Franklin. Some are purely practical and others are a mix of form and function. And all the tricks are under $12.

When Franklin is getting riled up and being really mouthy, this ducky on a string has been a life hand-saver. Instead of getting bit repeatedly while trying to play with a toy in my hand, the string allows me to keep my skin several feet away from his sharp puppy teeth.

Though we don’t let him play with the duck unattended due to the string, we have found him to be one of Franklin’s favorite “big boy” toys.

When it came to food bowls, I spotted these adorable little white ramekins at Target for just $1.99 each! They are far and away cuter and cheaper than the options I found at our local PetSmart.

For keeping the floors clean, Mr. Lively picked out this sea-foam tray at Ikea for just $11.99. It’s metal with a great coating that makes it waterproof and puppy-proof. Nothing he can do to this tray seems to alter it one bit.

In fact, we’ve found that Franklin also uses the tray as a napping station too.

After one week of clicker training Franklin has now learned “sit,” “lay down,” “shake,” “leave it,” “kisses,” “drop it,” and “high five.”

We’ve also been able to work on his impulse control immensely with these simple $1.49 clickers found at the checkout at PetSmart. There are actually four of these clickers all around the house paired with little snack bowls (filled with his actual food) for when he’s looking for attention and wants to do some “tricks.”

I’ve found some great clicker training tutorials here that have helped me get new ideas for commands and training.

Like most puppies, Franklin loves to chew. He’s fond of chewing baskets, rugs, pillows… whatever he can get his teeth on. We first purchased Bitter Cherry from a local supply store but we found out that Franklin actually likes the flavor.

After later reading about Tabasco, but not wanting to cover our furniture in orange sauce, we opted for white vinegar with chopped jalapenos. We’ve dabbed this on the baskets he adores and already we’ve seen him turn his nose at the scent and walk away. Victory!

Though it might not work for upholstered pieces, it’s great for cables and hard surfaces. Freezing his toys has also helped calm his little teeth and make his toys almost more appealing than the rug.

So there you have it!  A few of the simple, cheap ways I’ve found to keep our house in order and help our puppy grow into a little gentleman.

Over the last week Mr. Lively and I have gotten into some not-so-great habits.

When Franklin is acting up, which is pretty often at this point, we have started to refer to him as the Little Jerk (and other non-wonderful names) amongst ourselves and our friends. I also joked a few times about how he’s not the same pup that we first met.

And we’ve quickly realized this is not a worthwhile habit to cultivate or continue. Yes, he’s not very well behaved much some of the time. But he’s not terrible or far worse than normal puppy behavior.

We need to start speaking good things about his future as a more mature dog, rather than dwell on his current misbehavior and label him based on things we don’t love about him. Though it feels kinda funny in the moment, it’s not helping us to be better parents to him or interact with him in the best way possible.

I have a feeling these little nicknames are helping us lose our patience quicker and tainting how we see him as a whole. We need to stop calling him complaining nicknames and accept that he has a long way to go, but will become a great little guy in time.

We have joked that we love him, but don’t always like him. Now it’s time to start refer to him more lovingly, even when he’s not very likable.

The same goes for other aspects of life as well.

I thought that by picking the sweet puppy who gave us kisses and didn’t bark we were hitting the puppy jackpot.

I thought that he’d sit quietly on a bed next to me while I worked happily chewing a bone. That he’d be our faithful companion and woo everyone with his cute looks and clever tricks.

But as Mr. Lively famously said two days in, “I think we’re going to need to grow.” (Another famous Mr. Lively quote: “I think I wanted a dog, not a puppy.”) We are going to need to learn how to guide this little guy and help him become the good pup and dog he has the potential to be.

I’ve got to admit, it’s been a tough five days. I haven’t slept more than four hours straight since last Friday. I’ve spent 20+ hours with him each day and every simple task I complete is ten times more laborious and exhausting with him.

If having a puppy is anything like having a baby, I’ve got enough birth control for the next few years.

The first three days were the worst in terms of mouthing, chewing, crate training, and potty training.

And on my first run spent away from him, I had a heart to heart with myself. I had to admit that he wasn’t perfectly behaved, not even kinda well behaved. He really was kind of a jerk sometimes (namely when he was tired, needed to go out, hungry, thirsty, or playing really hard). I knew he’s a puppy and that he’ll grow out of it soon enough. But I also felt unprepared with how to guide him into becoming the good dog I so desperately hope he becomes. I didn’t have the knowledge and resources to cope with the biting and chewing.

So I resolved to be proactive about the situation. Just because I read a few puppy books ahead of time didn’t mean that I suddenly knew it all. I promptly began schooling myself again on other techniques and alternatives.

Fortunately I discovered Teacher’s Pet by Victoria Stilwell and I devoured her short videos intently (Franklin did too, he was fascinated by the dogs on the screen).

Instead of waiting for good behavior to surface from copious “good boys” I got the clicker out and started training that day. Within a few hours he learned “sit,” “[lay] down,” and “kisses.” I also put a toy on a string in order to play with him when he’s really riled up and mouthy without getting bit in the process.

For chewing we tried Bitter Cherry, but he liked the scent so we got a spray bottle with water to help curb intense chewing. I’m also going to try Tabasco on the cable cords near my desk to discourage chewing there too.

Already two training days in we are noticing a pretty substantial difference in his demeanor. He’s getting accustomed to his schedule, he’s more familiar with being alone in his crate with a treat toy, and the training commands with the clicker are working extremely well.

We still have a fair amount of chewing and mouthing to conquer  but it’s more manageable with these new tools. The most important being coffee and patience for me and a stuffed ducky on a string for him.

Despite my exhaustion I’m also trying to capture the little moments like taking the steps to welcome Daddy home while half-falling down the stairs, his first ice cube, and his confusion about what “shake” really means.

He’s only going to be five pounds for a short while. And though he can be a little jerk sometimes, he will outgrow the puppy habits and his little harness. I gotta appreciate the cute moments as well as curb the less desirable habits.

I’m glad I shouldered the intentional responsibility to grow as a human for the sake and well-being of our dog.

It’s a work in progress, but we’re all doing pretty good so far.

Today I’d like to introduce a dear reader and jewelry designer, Jen Moulton. I invited her to share her story which encourages us all to trust our instincts, especially where our health is concerned. Thanks, Jen, for your bravery and for sharing your story. 

Last year, my 25^th, was one of those years that you think can’t happen, especially to you.  It was so terrifyingly scary that I still have nightmares.  It all started innocuously enough, with stomach pains and upset, then progressed to feeling full too quickly and an inability to get comfortable and sleep through the night.  My abdomen quickly grew to what I would look like 20 weeks pregnant but because it happened over a few months, it was slow enough to rationalize.  I told myself that my body was just settling and holding onto a few extra pounds as I progressed into my mid-20s.

Well, I can tell you now that I was very wrong.  And after 10 weeks of doctor’s appointments and a few misdiagnoses (I was told I was too stressed and referred to stress classes and when I returned, I was misdiagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome and a urinary tract infection), I was finally sent for my first real test to see what was going on.  An ultrasound revealed that I had a large (think grapefruit) ovarian cyst.  And while I was terrified to have surgery, I was reassured that it could not be cancer because I was too young.

Fast forward through three weeks of life stress, which included a cross-country move to be closer to family along with indescribable discomfort and pain, to my surgery.  Much to my surprise (remember my doctor’s promise?), I learned that I did have ovarian cancer and that all the bad advice I’d received and misdiagnoses I’d endured allowed my cancerous tumor to grow to the size of a watermelon.  Can you imagine?  Needless to say, it was the shock of my life and indescribably unfortunate.  I’d diligently gone to my doctor to get help and my symptoms had been disregarded as hyperbole.

Here’s what you should know:

Ovarian cancer has earned the ‘silent killer’ nickname for a reason.  It is often symptom-less until it has progressed and its symptoms are similar to other diseases.

Symptoms can include bloating, digestive upset, feeling full with little food, frequent urination, change in bowels, abdominal discomfort, nausea and a lack of energy.  This is a good resource for more information.

Here’s what I hope you take away:

Trust your instincts.  I knew something was wrong, so I kept going back to my doctor.  Never ignore what your body and heart are telling you.

I believe you should trust your gut in all areas of life, especially concerning your health.  If your doctor doesn’t take your concerns seriously, go to another one.  Keep going until your needs are met.  I had my yearly exam in July and I started feeling symptoms in October (and I didn’t find out what was wrong until January).

Always go to your yearly exams, ALWAYS.  I know how awful/uncomfortable/sucky they are but they can save your life.  And trust me, you want to avoid having the 13 “yearly” exams I had least year.

The only peace I’ve been able to find in all of this (which ultimately included chemotherapy and took a year of my life) is to share my story so it stops happening.  At the very least, I hope you make that appointment you’ve been putting off and listen to the message your body is trying to communicate to you.   And if you can, please share this story with the ladies you love, you never know who it might help.

Over the weekend Mr. Lively and I added to our little family. (Benjamin) Franklin Lively has now entered our lives and our home.

The first 24 hours were a big adjustment for us all. But we are starting to get into the swing of things and today is his is first day “on the job” with me.

So far here’s what he’s accomplished.

Yes, this is his food tray. And yes, he has a bed two feet from the food tray.

He seems to have a tray fetish.

Just like his mom.

This week there is a lot to be thankful for. Primarily in the Jess LC arena. I would like to dedicate today’s Thankful For post to everyone who has supported Jess LC over the past fourteen years.

The “stylish” ankle bracelet design that started it all…

I would like to thank the fateful women that purchased my (ugly) ankle bracelets from me at the marina pool in 1999. Little did they know what they started…

I’d like to thank my mom and dad. After my first sale, Dad immediately encouraged me to turn my fateful ankle bracelets into a business at the age of 15. He encouraged me to grow, try selling online at 16 years-old, and even unknowingly gave me the insight needed to launch full-time after graduation.

Meanwhile my mom has more Jess LC items than any other person on the planet. She has dozens of my earliest pieces stored in a tray that I would have personally pitched a long, long time ago. Also, my mom really was my business role model. She made and sold crafts at fairs and to neighbors my entire childhood. So when my ankle bracelets accidentally sold, it was natural to grow a business modeled after her own crafting career while in high school.

Mr. Lively also deserves a hug and a kiss for listening to me go on, and on, and on about this new product or that new business opportunity. He was the number one supporter of my bag designs early on and he believed in my talent to go beyond jewelry design.

I’d also like to thank the ladies of Jess LC. Over the years I’ve worked with almost two dozen wonderful women of all ages. I  would like to thank my first assistant, Gertie, for training her then-roommate, Susie, how to make jewelry. For the past many years Susie has been making each piece of jewelry by hand for each customer. She has stood by me during thick and the thin. She also has listened to countless posts and emails and helped me become a better writer each day.

Then there are the assistants and interns of Jess LC. These wonderful ladies are beyond talented, dedicated, and will go on to do great things. I’m so thankful for their help and support along the way. They have helped make Jess LC truly special for our customers. Melissa deserves an extra thanks for going above and beyond the call of duty for so many, many years.

I would also like to write a special thank you to my business mentor, Mitch. I meet with him monthly for guidance, wisdom, and a good discussion on the growth and progress of the company. He has been behind me all the way and I cannot thank him enough for listening to me talk for the past four years. (I also hope he continues to assist in the future of my career as well.)

Of course I also need to thank the many, many store owners who have purchased our products. They have helped us grow and thrive across the US and Canada. They believed in my products and the buyers were a joy to work with.

And of course, I cannot leave out my early sales reps, they helped Jess LC distribution climb dramatically just before the recession, which made all the difference during that tough time.

I must also send out a salute to the Jess LC collaborators, models, and photographers who have helped bring new and exciting products and lookbooks to the Jess LC shop. It was a pleasure to work with such talented people. I’m also honored to now call these women (and men) my friends.

On top of all the support I’ve listed I cannot help but share the magnitude of my gratitude for the Jess LC customers who have supported us over the years. Without these wonderful men and (mostly) women purchasing our designs each day I would not have been able to grow this little company into something so special. We are fortunate to have some of the sweetest, most generous, and caring customers in the world. Literally the world! We have huge followings in the UK, Australia, Canada, and Singapore to name just a few. It has been a pleasure to ship our products to Paris, the Netherlands, Alaska, and Japan. Knowing that our goods produced in our little studio are being worn by people worldwide is beyond humbling.

And of course last but not least, I’d like to thank you, dear readers, for following me on this journey. Each launch, announcement, and sale was posted here on the blog and I thank you for listening, supporting, and even purchasing our products. When people ask how I was able to grow such a successful online business it is largely due to your support and I cannot thank you enough.

I know many are saddened by my decision to close the shop. I completely understand this and dedicate the second half of my career to helping others design lives, homes, and businesses with intention. No longer will I be focusing on products, I will now simply be of service. I now will focus my time on contribution, meaning, and intention.

After all, it’s what I’m meant to do.

Thank you for reading and have a great weekend.

As we close the Jess LC shop tonight at 6p CST I think this sweet, sweet email from a dear customer sums up all that I’ve hoped to accomplish over the past 14 years.

Jess & company -

What a bittersweet moment it was this evening to carefully unwrap the blue tissue encasing my last, and possibly best, purchase from you all.

After jumping on the Jess LC bandwagon maybe one, two years ago, my mother would come peek over my shoulder and ask if I was on “that jewelry site again” far too often. I’ll never forget the first item I purchased, a golden Braille pendant emblazoned with “dream bigger” (on sale) – thus began the surfeit of “where did you get that?” “what does it say?” “what does it mean?” questions. How proud I was of that necklace. I coerced the credit card out of my family wallet to order it – my first online purchase.

You are a home of firsts for me. The first time I fell in love with chevron. The first moment I figured out what the security code on a Frost card is. The first time I seriously considered small-business owning as a future for myself. The brand you have created for yourselves is classic, iconic, so fresh – and so, so personal. I am touched by the extent your kindness goes to each customer, to each piece. So often are these important things overlooked.

I know this all must seem so foolish coming from a sixteen year old like myself, who knows nothing of the trials of jewelry making, let alone business-owning.

Regardless.

THANK YOU.

Confidently I will walk into the future, my future, with “dream bigger” swinging from my neck and two beads of furious yellow tickling my earlobes. And I pray that you will continue on knowing that, whatever the stress, whatever the cost, you have inspired one little girl from Texas by simply dreaming bigger.

You have already done so much to help me – never stop designing, never stop HELPING.

“I have everything I have due to a lot of faith, my share of talent, and the simple ability to just keep going.”