This is nothing new.

I’ve actually found myself in this position many, many times before.

Two of my greatest strengths: ideation and activation, are constantly cooking up new ideas and then putting them into action asquicklyashumanlypossible.

It’s how I’ve rolled my entire career.

However, each time I find myself in this position, I usually have a little internal ego crisis about the situation.

I get super stressed out juggling everything and trying not to let my career take over my entire life. Eventually, after a season of self-doubt, I finally get to a point where I surrender and let some things go.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the back of my mind my ego whispered, “You can’t keep continuing every project you’ve made for years on end, so you must seem kinda seem flaky.” 

But I’ve now come to a peaceful realization: bushes are meant to be pruned. 

In order to live my life with intention and design my business in a way that I love, I will constantly be coming up with new ideas and launching them.

That is just who I am.

For me to continue to become the fullest version of myself also means that I need to allow myself to evolve and prune my career as I go. 

I’m all for trying new things. But in order for me to do so – without going crazy – I’m going to need to reign in other aspects that aren’t serving me anymore. 

Because I happen to be a pretty constant “new idea” person, this may mean that I will need to prune my business more frequently than other business owners.

That doesn’t mean that something is wrong with me.

It doesn’t make me flaky.

It just means that I happen to evolve and reinvent my career quicker than some.

I don’t need to continue stagnant projects that no longer feel exciting and spirit-led, just so that I won’t disappoint some people or because I want to “keep pace” with other business owners out there.

Heck, if I lived that way I never would have closed Jess LC in the first place.

I’d just keep launching product collections on top of a million other With Intention projects and go insane.

To keep doing those projects that pump me up and stay sane, I gotta be able to have a natural and healthy pruning process on a regular basis.

Like Joyce Meyer says, “You’re pruned if you do, you’re pruned if you don’t.” 

I might as well prune with joy.

Today on Wish I Knew Wednesday I have a special guest, Professor Alyssa Westring, sharing insights and research on managing work and family as a dual-career couple.

I have to say that from reading her thoughts I’ve already found a lot of clarity about my own relationship with Mr. Lively. I’ve also discovered why I have always enjoyed putting Franklin into doggy daycare a few days a week (hint: it’s not just because he loves playing with other pups all day).

This topic is going to hit home for those with with children, without children, married, or not married.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

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photo taken by

Tomorrow on Wish I Knew Wednesday I’ll be sharing my secret for improving the quality of your work.

I’ve used this concept over the past few years to raise the bar with Jess LC as well as With Intention, but it can be used effectively in any industry.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.

The more that I consult for business owners and watch the blogging world grow and evolve, I am struck by a process that I call “knocking on doors.”

Often, when we launch a new business or website, we place a lot of importance on the immediate actions and the success we yearn to have rightnow.

Not “right now,” but rightnow.

Which is totally understandable. When we do something new, it often involves an element of risk that can be scary. We are putting ourselves out there and daring to grow in new ways.

So we really want to see our actions pay off rightthissecond. 

However, looking from a higher vantage point, at the blogging community and small business landscape as a whole, it becomes easy to see that most of us don’t necessarily find our purpose behind the first door we knock on.

Instead, we often knock on a several doors, try a few different approaches within our industry, and (frequently) have lackluster results.

We begin to feel frustrated by our lack of success with our initial attempts. We might even start to doubt - just a little bit – whether we are meant to take this path after all.

It’s scary. We put their faith – and internal pressure – on the first door or two we knock on. We expect one to open and take us to the glory that we seek (sustainable income, full-time employment, front row seats at New York Fashion Week).  And when things don’t pan out as planned, options feel limited.

Then, quite frequently, someone else in our industry knocks on a new, different door we haven’t noticed before. This brand new door flys open for that person and incredible things happen for them.

At first, we might feel a bit frustrated and guarded about their success. It stings to know that it didn’t happen to us first.

However, once we overcome that initial pang of envy, we often rush to knock on the same door, hoping to have the same amazing results.

For some people, that new door is the right fit, too. Great things being to happen and they feel “on their way.”

But for most, knocking on that same door that worked for others is not the answer.

In fact, it can actually cloud our judgement about door selection overall. We can become so fixated on the success of our peer that we lose sight of what is the right door for ourselves.

Eventually, we become tired of knocking on that other door and never getting a response.

So we slowly wander away. We either give up at this point or we start tapping, hesitantly at first, on other doors.

We stop paying so much attention to the doors that are opening for others and focus on our own door preferences. We start to feel drawn, internally, to the doors that fit our own personality and lifestyle.

This is when the magic happens.

Most often, it is this next wave of door knocking that leads to the success that we sought all along. 

Often, the doors that do open for us look quite different than the first doors we were drawn to at the start.

We now realize those initial doors weren’t the right fit all along.

It was only through the process of knocking on the wrong doors that we began to understand which ones are right for us.

So if you find yourself knocking on doors and haven’t gotten an answer just yet, don’t worry.

If you keep going, listen to your gut, and go with what feels most natural, you are likely to find a door made just for you.

(And for those who might be wondering: a merry-go-round is a nice, but not a requirement.)

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Hi Caitlin!

Though I’ve been to Nashville once a few years back (to run the Country Music Marathon with Team in Training), I’ll be back to the friendly city August 1-4.

I’m excited to speak at Amber Housely’s AMBER HOUSELY: Inspired summit on August 1-2. Amber has a great line-up of speakers for the event and I’m proud to be one of them.

Specifically, I’ll be talking about growing a business team intentionally.

If you’d like to see more details about the event and register, please check out the site and video.

After the AH Inspired event on August 3rd and 4th, I’ll be hosting the Business and Life with Intention Workshops in Nashville as well!

And as a special bonus, Amber will also be joining us to talk about the inspiring work/life/mom/business balance she juggles so beautifully in the Business with Intention workshop.

Update: I’ve also made a new registration option for the With Intention workshops. We are now offering an optional three-payment registration plan for those who prefer to break up their registration into smaller chunks leading up to the workshop.

So if you have been thinking about coming to Amber’s AH Inspired or With Intention workshop, you now have a chance to do both in the same week!

During this kinda/sorta chaotic week, I haven’t had a chance to share some very exciting news: I’ve been profiled in Design*Sponge’s Biz Ladies series!

I deeply respect the Biz Ladies series and I recommended it to many of my business clients. It is a great resource for free, high quality business advice.

To find myself among the women and men profiled here feels pretty surreal.

I’m deeply grateful that I got to share the journey I’ve been on over the past fourteen years of entrepreneurship. As usual, I kept it real and shared the high and low points of the journey and have some practical advice for those starting out.

Thank you Grace and Stephanie for the chance to share my story!

{Things have been so hectic since I got back from San Francisco that I’m still catching up on everything. This also meant that yesterday I did not get the Wish I Knew Wednesday teaser posted like normal.}

This week today on Wish I Knew Wednesday, I will be focusing on dealing with poor business investments. Though it’s not often talked about, there are times in almost all businesses when we invest in business tools or programs that turn out to be a waste of time or money (often, both).

But there are silver linings to these investments. I’ll be sharing more about what to do if you find yourself in this situation in today’s email.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

Now that I’m back in Chicago, the workshops in San Francisco feel like a whirlwind!

As I’ve been prepping this recap it’s been nice to take a little trip back to the action and remember all the details.

I had so much fun in the Business with Intention workshop. We spent a lot of time focusing on the business purpose for each participant. We found new insights and opportunities for each person to take things to the next level.

In addition, the new With Intention Notebooks made their debut!

It was so great to see notes added to the beautiful workbooks created by Jackie of Believe Notes.

On Sunday, we had our Life with Intention workshop.

We had a great time clarifying what intention really means and there seemed to be quite a few ‘a-ha’ moments for each participant.

And when it came to running the show, Natalie Comstock of Natatlie Dressed and Casie M. of Skipping Scones did a fantastic job.

Natalie was our stylist/assistant for the weekend. Did you notice on her welcome table in the first picture that she included the workshop participants names in the framed welcome sign?

I’ve never seen a more clear communication of my brand: white, gold, coral, flowers, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, and The 4-Hour Workweek all represented.

Talk about above and beyond.

And then there was the food.

Amazing, delicious, and healthy food. The meals paired with the presentation really made the day feel like we were living in our own little Pinterest world.

Jen, my amazing Commander in Chief, outdid herself on the goodie bags this time around.

We are beyond thankful for the following small business owners for supporting the workshops:

Sarah of Parrot Design Studio shared stationery care packages and calendars (seen below).

Melissa of Melrose Street Custom Content gave each Business workshopper a complimentary content session to help them with their business website.

And Shannon of Simple Pursuits donated a note card that speaks to the intentional side of the workshop.

Jen of Jennie Claire made beautiful gold-filled necklaces for each participant as well. (I’ve been wearing mine almost every single day since.)

We also had these gorgeous candy colored leather notebooks from Angee of Sheic Journals. So cute and practical!

Linda of Ruby Red Design Studio gifted these adorable standing calendars.

And last but certainly not least we had a pouch filled with goodies from Alicia of Whimsey Box! (You can imagine my delight when I saw the gold and white washi tape.)

Now, it’s time to let some of the workshoppers share about their experience in their own words.

“The way Jess tells it, I only signed up for the Business With Intention workshop for the cute notebook. Here’s the thing–she’s right! When I saw the gorgeously designed workbooks on her website, they represented how I envision my business. I want to be the kind of self-assured, passionate entrepreneur who writes her fabulous ideas in a notebook like that.

I’ve made some pretty big mistakes with my business, and I’ve followed bad advice that put me in debt and made me hate the work I used to enjoy. During the workshop, Jess explained that those mistakes happened for a reason and I can learn from them and be of better service to my clients and myself. I was touched by her empathy, and I feel like I can forgive myself now.

The best part of the day (and there were a lot of good parts including the content, food, and ambiance) was the one-on-one attention I received. I’ve been to other business events where everyone gets the same broad information. Jess took the time to really understand my concerns with her unique way of seeing what truly motivates her clients (it’s kinda freaky!).

And my learning didn’t stop after the workshop. We were given exercises to deep dive into our businesses’ purposes and intentions. The workbook modules have me taking my big-picture ideas and breaking them down into actionable baby steps for today and the weeks and months to follow. You can’t find this stuff anywhere else, and believe me, I’ve looked.

The notebook alone is worth the cost of registration. Oh, and it’s super cute too. Thanks for everything, Jess!”

- Sage Grayson, Sage Grayson Coaching, Business with Intention workshop

“I came to the workshop looking for tools and directions for my life and those are exactly what I got.  Of course, a day away to focus on ME and my visions also was a treat.  Within the first thirty minutes, I knew I’d come to the right place.  The workshop felt like an emotional retreat for me.  Jess created such a welcoming, loving and excepting environment that it was easy for me to open up and be heard.   I was able to voice my concerns and together, we worked out solutions that felt right to me.  It was all in all a fantastic day!”

- Sunray, Life with Intention workshop

“I had such a great experience working with you and the other wonderful women yesterday! Not knowing what to expect, I decided to throw myself head first into the experience. Being honest with yourself can be a scary and somewhat difficult thing– but I felt nothing but supported and encouraged to speak my deepest truth and I’m all the better because of it. I feel confident moving forward to the next stages in life after developing a personal, realistic approach to my priorities. In fact, I am inspired to push even further! The Life with Intention workshop was exactly the jumpstart I needed in life and I cannot thank you enough for your compassion and advice.”

- Jenny W, Life with Intention workshop

“When I got the email from Jess’ assistant, Jen, telling me I was chosen as the stylist/assistant for the SF workshops, I was shocked, but also thrilled. Jen and I emailed back and forth leading up to the workshop discussing guidelines, my styling ideas, logistics, etc. Jen also put me in contact with Casie, the talented foodie for the SF workshops, so we could coordinate the meal setups. Jen made the whole process leading up to the workshops simple and stress-free.

Working the actual workshops was so much fun. Jess gave me and Casie both the freedom to execute our ideas as we wished. I wasn’t surprised to see how kind and fun Jess was is in real life. She has a light about her that just makes you want to be best friends with her.

Jess invited Casie and I to join in the workshop discussions whenever we had spare time away from our duties, which was really exciting for me as a long-time reader of Jess’ blog. The With Intention workshops inspired me and gave me more clarity than anything I’ve experienced. Jess really has a knack for helping people find their purpose, but she also makes sure to give you actionable steps you can take to move forward. She is the best listener and is really great at pealing back the layers and showing us that what we really want is already inside of us – a lot of times it’s just hiding under a bunch of crap. I left feeling refreshed and ready to move in the right direction rather than stressed about trying to carry out some massive, out of reach dream.”

- Natalie, Natalie Dressed, San Fran Stylist/Assistant

 
“Being chosen as the “With Intention Foodie” was the best experience – Jess really gave me the strength to run my own show for the event. Even though I’m an amateur, she had confidence in me and let me contribute to her already inspiring workshop.  I believe Jess is a great listener and a great innovator, someone you’d want to have as friend and that is really telling during these workshops.  The attendees really need to open up so Jess can do her best ‘work’ and she completely enables each individual to do so.  I truly had a great experience and would do it again.  Thank you, Jess!”

- Casie M, Skipping Scones, San Fran Foodie

Thank you, thank you to Jen, Natalie, Casie, and the workshoppers for supporting me during the awesome weekend. I’m beyond grateful to get to work with you and serve you.

And for those interested in the Austin Life and Business workshops in June, is exactly one spot left in each workshop!

photos by myself and Natalie

This week I have been hustling with my regular workload while preparing for the San Francisco Life and Business with Intention workshops this weekend.

Since today is the last day I have to get everything settled until next Tuesday, I have quite a lot to jam into the few hours before and after my client sessions this afternoon.

Which means I’m taking Mr. Job’s advice and focusing on the top priorities and keeping things simple.

After working with hundreds of small business owners across the country (and Canada and Mexico, too!) grow businesses with intention over the past two years, I have come to deeply understand that designing a business “with intention” is only part of the equation.

In fact, it’s the second part of the equation.

The first part of the equation, if ignored, generally leads to disappointing sales and a sense of frustration. Of not feeling “special enough” in the eyes of the customer or the entrepreneur (sometimes, both).

A truly meaningful and successful business must be based on purpose and then grown with intention.

This is so essential that I’ve now redesigned my entire business arm of my career to helping business owners answer the first and second part of this equation.

Below is my manifesto for this often missing link.

The Purpose-Based Business Manifesto

We live in a wonderful time.

A time where it is easier than ever to start and grow small – and large – businesses with the help of technology and the internet.

A time where people no longer believe “getting by” is an acceptable way to live.

We want to thrive.

We want more from our lives and careers – in very individualized ways.

This desire to do something that matters and pursue our passions has led to an explosion of new businesses. Often, these businesses are creative with a strong online presence.

In fact, women owned businesses in the US are up 54% in the past 15 years.

Indeed, it is a wonderful time.

But with this business boom, the creative business industries have gone from lean to bustling.

This influx of peers has resulted in a feeling of over-saturation for some.

To thrive in the creative world, we can no longer simply call ourselves “stationery designers,” “copywriters,” or “health coaches.”

Those are crowded spaces with many claiming the same.

Rather, we must lean deeper into our hearts, talents, and experiences and draw upon our own unique value proposition to stand out and differentiate ourselves within our industry.

We must draw products and services from our purpose, not the other way around.

From a place of clear, authentic purpose we can find higher value (bigger profits), service (more fulfillment), and our ideal clients (people who desire exactly what we have to offer).

Our branding, marketing, and social media actions become direct, clear, and unique when we let our purpose direct our steps.

Though it may seem daunting to try to define a purpose for your business, it is far from difficult.

In fact, I’m here to help you do just that.

Tomorrow on Wish I Knew Wednesday I’m going to be discussing my new take on blogging as a full-time career. Things are changing in the blog world and the business side is shifting as well.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

Before we head into the weekend, I am excited to share a little sneak peek of the brand new Life and Business with Intention workbooks!

They are white. They are gold. And they are lovely.

I’ve been working with Jackie of Believe Notes on this project for the past few months and I’m thrilled with how the workbooks turned out.

Though I knew I wanted a fresh look, I had no idea Jackie could make my dreams come true. These workbooks are no longer designed simply for the workshop day itself. They are filled with extras materials and plenty of lined paper so that they can become an organizational tool for life participants and business owners going forward as well.

They will make their first debut next weekend at the San Francisco workshops (today’s the last day to register, by the way) and then they will visit Austin in June.

In other news, a photo shoot on Tuesday for some new upcoming projects also garnered a fresh look on the With Intention homepage.

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you have a great weekend! 

You might have noticed that there have been some blog updates on the sidebar recently. Among the tweaks, I’ve decided to take sidebar sponsors down from the site.

This has been an intentional decision made a few months ago. As sponsor ads have expired, I have intentionally turned away future sponsors with the understanding that I would be removing sidebar sponsorships completely.

Currently, for my content and readers, I no longer feel that sidebar ads are the right fit.

This is partly due to the declining value of sidebars in blogging as a whole (as shared at Alt Summit by multiple panelists) and the evolution of my own blog and business.

Though sidebar revenue was always a nice bonus, it was never what “paid the bills” throughout the years. So though this decision is happening now, it is not drastically affecting my business in any major way.

And though I may eventually do collaborations with other companies or small businesses in the future, they will be more intentionally content driven –  rather than sidebar focused.

I have deeply appreciated the support of my sponsors over the years and I am proud to know that many have had wonderful business connections and clients come from appearing on the blog.

You might be wondering, “What does it feel like to go sidebar sponsor free?”

It’s actually been a pleasant surprise. Though I never felt any extreme pressure to “perform” when I had sponsors in the past, the site and content now feels a bit more intimate somehow.

It’s just me, writing to you.

Just like before, but… quieter somehow. Simpler.

If for some reason I need to take a few days off of blogging, I feel a lightness about that decision.

Statistics feel more irrelevant now that traffic isn’t a guiding factor for sponsor rates.

And my final hope, like I’ve found lately with my WIKW newsletters, is that I’ll feel more comfortable being the full “me” in this space.

Sometimes I have the subtle feeling that I am holding back (a little) from saying all that I think and feel about a subject if I fear it might be somehow alienating to some people.

This softening of my opinions on some topics isn’t doing you any real justice or true service, even though it might be more palatable overall. And though this has nothing to do with sidebar sponsors specifically, I think it speaks to my feeling that we are now in a more intimate space.

My home.

I’m not planning on being controversial for the sake of it – I just want to push the boundaries of my own bravery. To be the feistier, goofier, and slightly more opinionated version of myself.

The way I am in real life.

{Quick announcement: Tomorrow is Chicago’s Business in the City. I hope to see you there!}

Guys, I’m really excited about tomorrow’s WIKW.

While at Alt Summit, I had the pleasure of meeting Amber Housely. Though I was familiar with her business before meeting her, my jaw dropped when I found out that she’s been running her incredible business alongside a full-time day job and raising a little boy.

She has forever changed my understanding of midnight hustling and I’ve asked her to share her story and empowering perspective on balancing a day job with a small business.

I promise, it’s gonna be good.

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Three years ago I wrote a simple little post which I believe still holds true for business owners and bloggers (and anyone else struggling to start something new). 

Over the past few months I have been getting more emails from women writing me about advice for their businesses or blogs. In talking with many of the women, I am noticing a pattern: people want to make things more complicated than they are. I am all for due diligence and research, please don’t get me wrong. I think that is an important part of being successful. But ultimately, I think the research and constant “what if-ing” will halt all progress which leads to the launch of the actual business.

Please don’t let your dream or purpose lie dormant in your heart (or in a business proposal binder) because of any uncertainty – all entrepreneurship will involve uncertainty. The key is to just begin, and then keep going. To cross the start line and then start tripping, then start falling, and after each tumble you get up and continue onward.

Another obstacle lurking before the start line to avoid is the “everyone else has it figured out” trap. When you look around at your competitors or even businesses that inspire you, please do not assume they all launched with perfect clarity, perfect graphics, and perfect products. They stumbled and fell many, many times on their way to success. And the key is that they learned and grew after each failure and honed their craft to the beauty you see today.

Take my {now previous} business for example, though I’m pretty darn proud of what it has become, I make no bones about where it began: with ugly ankle bracelets.

Not exactly a threat to Tiffany & Co.

But at 15-years-old, I didn’t let that stop me. Some women bought them from me at a pool. And the first thought in my head was, “how can I sell more ankle bracelets?” I didn’t think about creating the perfect company, I thought about how to improve from where I began. I started with selling ankle bracelets made from seed beads. Then I taught myself to wire wrap. Then I bought crystals. Then I built a website. It was all done one step at a time. It’s that simple.

It’s always that simple.

Don’t let your ego talk you into thinking you need to be anything other than incrementally better than where you are now. This is not a race for anyone but yourself. As long as you are getting faster and moving forward, you are winning. And winning beats the heck out of spraining your ankle before the race.

Tomorrow on Wish I Knew Wednesday we are celebrating the first birthday of the newsletter!

In the process, I’ll also be sharing what I’ve learned from the last year of writing this newsletter which now has had close to 50 editions.

Though I never expected this little ol’ series to go this long or be so loved, it has turned into a great offering for myself and my readers in so many ways. Tomorrow I’ll be sharing my take on the essentials for a powerful, worthwhile newsletter.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

Today marks the one year anniversary of the launch of Wish I Knew Wednesday and it also happens to be the birthday of the brand new With Intention website!

Last Tuesday I got “a crazy little idea” to completely overhaul the site and add new functionality - in less than a week.

Thankfully, Mr. Lively (who happens to be a talented web programmer) was up for the challenge.

A day of design (me) and two long nights of programming later (him), we have a whole new space for you to explore and enjoy.

While I’m on the subject of With Intention, I should also do a last call for those interested in applying for the San Francisco Life and Business with Intention workshop scholarship spots coming up on April 20-21st.

Jen is selecting the scholarship recipients later this week. So please get your email applications in by Wednesday night.

And again, feel free to go explore the new site!

Recently, the concept of “willingness” has come to my attention. Though I’ve never given the idea or term much thought in the past, it seems to be following me around.

It’s popping up in my Course in Miracles reading each morning. It’s the concept I’m most drawn to in the levels of consciousness chart I shared last week.

When I think about it, the concept of willingness is what has allowed me to grow a business from the age of 15 with a $5 bag of beads. Willingness was what allowed me to move to Chicago with $700 in the bank after graduation and set up my business full-time in a studio apartment.

I was willing to have anxiety attacks over cash flow.

I was willing to take on interns when I was a year out of school myself. Without a clue about being a boss.

I was willing to dip into my savings to re-brand my company.

I was willing to learn how to work with manufacturers to make products beyond my speciality – and make mistakes along the way.

I was willing to do whatever I could with whatever I had.

Recently, I feel like willingness is less common. Or perhaps less commonly spoken about.

In an effort to establish “credibility” or exude ”success,” especially online, we are less interested in sharing the sacrifices, trade-offs, and lessons learned. We are less likely to share the nitty-gritty or not-so-pretty.

The problem with this phenomenon is that is isolating. It make it appear as though no one struggles. It makes it appear as if there is some sort of secret to “success” that some know and some do not.

But the truth is that talent, value, and willingness, are among the factors that cultivate long-term success.

We are comfortable sharing our talents and value, but shy away from what we were willing to do to get where we are.

No, I’m not suggesting we give a play-by-play of our actions. But I do think we can share our humble beginnings and difficult trade-offs in a more collaborative way so that other’s don’t feel like they are alone, struggling and making hard choices.

As a first step towards cultivating a more “willing” community, I kindly ask: what have you been willing to do?

This week on Wish I Knew Wednesday I’ll be sharing my take on crafting a website that stands out. The ideas presented will be helpful for those with sites or those just starting out. In fact, I’m going to be sharing the changes I’m currently implementing on my own site.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

Last week I mentioned a few of my work-from-home quirks like my new home-working arrangement and my obsession with eating out.

In response, Jamie Silver directed me to Coffitivity via Twitter.

It’s simple, yet amazing.

If you are alone in your home studio or in a cubicle in a corporate office, visit this site and be instantly transported to your own personal coffee shop.*

*Caffeine not included.

 PS – Check out my interview about business and Franklin in Pawsh Magazine on page 38. 

This week on Wish I Knew Wednesday I’ll be sharing my tips and take on using social media effectively.

Though I know many people have a pretty good handle on this topic lately, I do have some key suggestions which have proved to be impactful for myself and my clients.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

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Today I realized the best thing I can do to serve you is share a feisty piece I wrote in 2011. I promise, it’s worth reading (or re-reading)…

Pardon me, but I’m a little fired up today. While standing in line at the CVS to pick up some contact solution yesterday afternoon, I glanced at the cover of one of the weekly magazines and saw a feature on how “Ali from The Bachelor lost 10 pounds as revenge”… or something like that. Regardless of why she was losing weight as revenge (which is a pretty strange notion to begin with) or what she actually did to achieve the weight loss, I found myself with ruffled feathers.

I know that on another day, in the not-so-distant past, I would have stood there and wondered what she did to lose the weight, wondered how she might be happier now (I mean look, she got a cover feature), and speculated about whether I should try her methods to lose weight myself. But something inside me has shifted (at least for the moment). Ever since the trip to NYC and realizing my intention to pursue PR for Jess LC, my paradigm has changed. Rather than look to others successes for guidance in my life, I’ve become much more interested in my own actions and using those to propel myself further. I’ve become more interested in how I want to become successful than how others have reached their own successes.

Though I think there is a lot to be said about bibliographies, success stories, advice, and research, I also feel many of us are getting too comfortable sitting on the sidelines reading and watching other people achieve their dreams — and then attempting to replicate their achievements in our own lives.

The problem with this copycat method, I believe, is that it leaves us with a second-rate version of what worked for someone else, which doesn’t take into complete consideration all of our own unique factors. And therefore, whatever plan we follow, is innately going to clash with our individual abilities, motivations, and values – which ultimately leads to dissatisfying results, unmaintainable goals, or a simple lack of follow through on our part. Our actions need to speak to us on all levels, spiritually, physically, and mentally, and it’s very hard to really grasp that in a cookie cutter plan or a shadowed routine.

The one major concession I make in the above paragraph is when a particular plan does meet your individual spiritual, physical, and mental values – then the plan could quite possibly work with flying colors. Take my brother, for example. He has been preparing to follow the P90X routine this summer for almost a full year. He researched, thought about it, planned his meals, and devoted the hours he needed in order to reach his goal. He became so intrinsically motivated by the plan and the outcome that he faithfully executed each exercise and nutrition requirement to its fullest. He also reaped the rewards he desired in the process. On the other hand, I tried the Weight Watchers program for several months but finally realized I wasn’t seeing results because I wasn’t dealing with the right spiritual issue.

I maintain that many most of our failed attempts come from the fact that we are trying to fit ourselves into a prescribed routine that isn’t capturing our real desires. Or, we are fearful of failure and rush to find comfort in something that has worked for someone else. This constant focus on the information itself keeps us so busy listening to others that we are unable to actually devote the full amount of energy and attention that it takes to reach our goals.

I think this is because we underestimate how much time and devotion it requires to take action, follow through, and maintain progress. We think that if we “know” everything, we will be able to “do” everything. But the real knowledge comes from personal experience, until then, it’s just information in our brains. To follow with the magazine story example, we don’t really know how to lose weight until we actually drop the pounds. Until then we “have the weight loss information” without any experience to back it up.

So, back to my ruffled feathers, I am finding that for the first time I feel bold, less fearful of failure, and more focused on what I’m going to do next. I’m writing my success story each day that I take new actions and try new things. Not all of the things I try will lead to the success I am looking for, but each step ahead is one further away from where I started. It is a constant process that takes into consideration my personal values and goals. My path will be one-of-a-kind and unrepeatable because I am following my gut and trusting things to fall into place. I am following my purpose which is unique to me. Everyone is capable of doing this exact same thing for themselves, they just need to start tapping into what they know and stop looking around at the people next to them.

My Challenge to You

I challenge those who find themselves easily caught in the research and advice trap to take a minute this afternoon and write your own success story. Write out a future magazine feature story detailing how you are successful in three months, six months, or two years from now at the thing you are working towards.

For example, if you want to create a full-time business but are in a desk job, write the story explaining how you made your business so profitable you were able to quit your job after nine months. Explain what actions you took, what marketing efforts you made, what hiring decisions you struggled with. Write it all out and then use that as your own road map to success. Because when you stop and think about it, the story you just wrote captures your spiritual, psychical, and mental abilities and values. Your plan understands you perfectly and you resonate with it 100%.

In summary, stop reading someone else’s success story and start writing your own.

PS - Business in the City Chicago is coming up this Wednesday. I hope to see you there!

Today I’d like to chat about a question that has been tossed around several times over the past few months in the Lively household:

To eat out or to eat at home?

After a long day at work, Mr. Lively often wants nothing more than to come home and cook dinner. Meanwhile, after my long day at work I want nothing more than to get outta the house and enjoy a meal at one of our favorite neighborhood spots – or delivery, if I’m feeling lazy.

For a while, we attributed this difference of dinner opinion to the fact that Mr. Lively likes cooking and I do not.

However, upon closer examination it’s a bit deeper than that.

Because I work from home, 99% of the time I eat breakfast and lunch in the apartment. There are many days (especially in the Chicago winters) where I may not even leave the house before 6pm, aside from taking Franklin out.

So by eating from the same selection of foods over and over and over, working and living in the same space, and being a fan of the local cuisine, I naturally want to get the heck out of the apartment the minute Mr. Lively steps foot in the door.

Whereas Mr. Lively, who has been gone all day and often eats out during lunch, wants to come home and spend time in the apartment with a home-cooked meal.

It’s a tricky business.

We also realize that my penchant for ordering from a menu is not very economical.

But even so, there are days where eating at home after being home all day makes my skin crawl. 

I know that sounds a bit dramatic, but it’s true.

For now, we’ve decided that we will give ourselves a target of cooking dinner on three weeknights and the other two can be my choice.

With all of this in mind, I have to wonder: do any other couples or work from home people experience this same mealtime predicament?

Though I love many things about working from home, there are some drawbacks.

I don’t get the friendly interaction with co-workers, casual lunch breaks, and water cooler chatter that others get in a traditional office job.

Coffee shops are a nice alternative. But with Franklin still in puppy mode, it’s hard to keep him crated for a long time. Plus, he’s already going to puppy day care twice a week during my intense consulting or appointment filled days.

And though co-working spaces are a popular option for entrepreneurs and freelancers, I’ve never wanted to spend that much time commuting or paying for separate office space.

So recently my friend Kim and I came up with a new work from home alternative: home-working.

Going forward, each Tuesday we have a standing appointment to work together from one of our homes. For the time being, we plan to work from my place for the most part as Franklin gains longer bladder control and stops attempting to destroy our rug. Jack, Kim’s pup, may also start home-working with us as well in the future.

This home-working arrangement provides us the chance to chit-chat, run business situations by one another, and go out to lunch together (like our husbands do with their co-workers).

It was amazing to see how productive, yet relaxed we were working alongside one another. Having a home-worker friend has proved to be the perfect way to break up a week spent mostly alone in front of a computer or on a phone.

And the best part? It’s free.

No coffee shop snacks or co-working passes to pay for. If we feel like eating out, that’s our big splurge for the day.

Though I personally am partial to the one-on-one home-working scenario, other entrepreneurs could even decide to invite a group of people to their homes and rotate on a weekly basis. The options are really endless when you think about it.

It’s nice to discover “working from home” doesn’t have to be a solo activity.

In this week’s Wish I Knew Wednesday, I’m going to share my personal journey over the past six weeks towards thriving. As a female entrepreneur it’s easy to stay stuck in survival mode far longer than necessary.

In fact, I contend that it’s never necessary to feel stuck in “survival mode.”

… I’ll explain more tomorrow.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

Today I’ve been hustling to make the changes to the With Intention workshops as fast as I can.

You see, I’m going in a new direction after this past weekend’s Boston workshop. 

I’m going big.

And by big, I mean small.

Over the past year I’ve hosted several of these workshops across the country and I’ve been learning a lot.

And though I had a certain idea about what the workshop content, size, and materials should include in the beginning, I have also been holding the events with open hands.

I’ve been doing my best to let these workshops evolve and to be of service in whatever way best serves the attendees.

Having seen the massive transformation that occurred in Boston this weekend, I now understand that limiting the size of the group to an intimate handful changes everything.

In an online world which seems to be scaling as much as possible, I want to make these events in-depth and personalized.

I believe that scaling has it’s place. And I may also create scalable products in the future. But in my workshops, I now realize the value is in the massive amount of individualized attention for each person in the group.

Which means going forward I’m now limiting my workshops to five people and one scholarship spot per workshop. 

At first I thought it seemed crazy. Flying all over the country (maybe the world?) just to work with 12 people over two days? I’d have to be crazy to do that. 

But that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

Meanwhile I’m continuing to provide inspiring food, spaces, goodies, and experiences for these intimate workshops.

From the Boston workshop, I now have real, true connections with each participant. Friendships and collaborations were formed among the business owners who will continue to stay in touch (and may even start their own chapter of Biz in the City).

Plus, I’m going to take the Business with Intention workshop a step further. I’m now adding a follow-up hour long consult session to the business workshop.

This way the business owners I work with will have me on speed dial as they implement the changes we discuss during the workshop itself.

As you can imagine, limiting the workshops to this small of a size requires a price shift, but I’ve made sure that the early bird and combo discounts continue. I’m also offering payment plans for those who are interested in smaller chunks at a time.

I deeply believe that the life- and business-changing experiences from Boston are reflected in these values.

Interested in hearing from the workshoppers themselves? Here’s what each and every person had to say.

Elizabeth Crane Swartz, Seagrass Studio 

Business and Life with Intention Workshops

I came to both intention workshops seeking ideas, how to’s and help both with my business and my life. Jess has a remarkable talent for helping you re-discover all that is good and unique about you and your business and within minutes I knew I’d come to the right person. It was so refreshing to have someone just get me. Do you know how good that feels?

Jess was able to help me sort through the crap to believe in my talents, admit what work needs to be delegated and identify where to spend my time and energy. No more wondering, researching, modifying someone else’s game plan.

Because Jess limits the workshops to a small and intimate group we were able to work collaboratively and problem solve as a group. Honestly, the wealth of experience and compassion Jess brings to her blog is even better in person and amplified by each participant in the workshops.

Thanks to Jess, I have the focus, purpose and direction I’ve been craving and it’s all perfectly specific to me, my life and my business.

(See Elizabeth’s full recap here.)

Jackie M, Believe Notes

Business and Life with Intention Workshops

The Business and Life With Intention Workshops helped me in ways I never truly dared to imagine were possible.

Having such an intimate group made it feel as if we were all there with the sole purpose of helping one another look at our own businesses through new eyes with clearer purpose and intention. Jess was a vital part of the group – leading our discussions, offering insights, and strategically helping us to move beyond our own preconceived limitations.

I left the workshop feeling inspired and motivated and made several immediate steps to move my business in the direction I wanted it to go. With my new purpose and intention, I was able to accomplish more for my business in the one day after the workshop than I had accomplished for my business in 2 years!

Ashley Howard Goltz, The Design Stylist

Business with Intention Workshop

As a small marketing and design studio, I love creating unique brands for my clients.  Focusing so much energy on my clients made me realize I had lost some of the passion I once had for own company.  I knew I needed the help of a like-minded visionary who understood the business aspect as well as the creative.

The workshop changed my entire perspective.

Jess helped me to figure out why I wasn’t in love with my business anymore, and gave me a new voice for myself and the future of my business. Her insight and ability to help me find a niche position in a crowded market of talented and creative designers and marketing professionals is priceless. The small group dynamic and intuition from the other workshop participants was invigorating and I cannot wait to turn the action plan developed in the workshop into my own reality.

Sheerley Z.

Life with Intention Workshop

Thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU. The workshop was exactly what I needed. It was like a massive exfoliation all on its own. Being away from my own life, and being surrounded by you and the wonderful participants and just hearing what my life sounded like to people who weren’t a part of it was really liberating. Being in that beautiful and welcoming environment, I could easily see what needed to be exfoliated from my life (thought patterns, feelings, stuff, etc.). It even gave me the opportunity to forget to have negative or typical thought patterns that I might otherwise have had about the topics we discussed!

I feel like I have found the tools I need to move forward in my life, that you showed me I had all along. I honestly couldn’t have seen that without you. The workshop was billed as a retreat, and that’s exactly how it felt. A chance to step outside “normal” life and look at it objectively. You’ve created something really special here, and I can’t wait to see where this takes you!

Patrick M.

Life with Intention Workshop 

Walking into the with-intention workshop, I was warmly welcomed to “the land of femme.” And it’s true; the work space was beautifully decorated with a woman in mind.

But, gents, with-intention workshops are universal in content. Man or woman, this is your life. The workshop helped me create new work patterns, build new relationships, break routines, and build a vision for myself, my work, and my life. I left with the tools and feedback that will help put intentions into my everyday. In the workshop I created an action plan that allows for growth and a range of success. The network created ensures that the support remains even after our workshop was concluded.

So work with Jess, learn from a meaningful discussion, enjoy great food, and, best of all, leave with personalized intentions, an action plan, and a network of continuing feedback and support. In other words, girlfriends get your guyfriends and tell them about with-intention.com.

Ashlee Thurlow, Ashlee Thurlow

Business with Intention Workshop

The Business With Intention workshop gave me such clarity about my business and the ‘why’ behind it.  Instead of being overwhelmed like I have been the last few months, I now feel like I have a clear list of ideas and tasks to grow my business and run it, instead of having it run my life. THAT is an awesome feeling!

Allison Whittemore, Halcyon Style

Boston Workshop Assistant

When Jess posted a few weeks back about needing an assistant for the Boston workshops I jumped at the opportunity and amazingly was selected! I was prepared for the role of assistant to entail a lot of setting up, mealtime preparation, clean up and general behind the scenes tasks.

Her amazing assistant, Jen, and I corresponded initially about venue locales, Boston foodies and other general questions about the area.  Then, a few days before the workshops Jen emailed asking about whether I’d be willing to pick up flowers Saturday morning to create our own arrangements.  I also took a chance and threw some leftover paper table runner in Jess’ favorite white and gold into my bag.

Arriving Saturday morning and seeing my armful of supplies, I was humbled and honored that Jess deferred most of the workspace styling to my judgment. I was also amazed and blessed to be invited to participate in a majority of group discussions, so long as I kept up with the behind the scenes duties I mentioned above. And really, could anything be better than meeting and spending the weekend learning from the genuine, intuitive and charming Jess Lively?

(See Allison’s full recap here.)

Sophie S, Just Live Into It

Boston Workshop Foodie

I had the opportunity to be the Foodie for the Boston With Intention workshops – and what an opportunity it was! I’m an home cook but Jess took a chance on me and I’d been given a platform to turn my hobby into something more.

Over the next two weeks I emailed back and forth with Jen nailing down all the details. I was given complete creative control over the menu, and it was nice to feel like Jen and Jess had such confidence in me. When I arrived Saturday morning and met Jess, I was blown away by her energy (and she hadn’t even had a cup of coffee yet!)

Jess is truly a pleasure to work with – her positivity is contagious. You can’t help but feel inspired when you’re around her. Throughout the weekend, it was so great getting to see Jess in action. She was professional and encouraging, and challenged everyone there – whether they were a workshop participant or not – to think outside of the box. I left the workshop on Sunday night with a renewed sense of confidence in my cooking skills, new friends, and a list of intentions for my future. I am so grateful that Jess gave me such an incredible opportunity!

(See Sophie’s full recap here.)

I’m so grateful for the wonderful workshops I’ve had in the past year and I cannot wait to see how this new format grows and evolves in the future.

Please also know I have not decided how many new locations will be added to 2013 yet. Right now I imagine there will be 2-4 other locations after the Austin workshop in June.

But I also do not plan to trace back to past cities (as much as possible and excluding Chicago, my hometown). So if you see your city listed, please come then instead of waiting until the next time around, since there may not be another.

I hope you join me in San Fran or Austin! It’s going to be awesome.

It’s kinda hard to put the Boston workshop weekend into words.

Though I’ve done several workshops across the country and had a great time everywhere, this weekend changed things. For me, for the workshopper’s lives and businesses, and for the Boston foodie and assistant.

We had an amazing – life and business – altering time.

And because of this workshop, I’m taking these travelling workshops in a bit of a different direction. I’ll explain more about that soon, but for now, I’d like to share, thank, and support the wonderful people who made this special weekend possible.

First of all, I’d like to thank Allison and Sophie for doing such an incredible job at assisting, styling, and cooking.

Allison did a fantastic job styling the space with some awesome gold and white chevron runners and white ranunculus and pink anemones (I now know what they are and I’m obsessed).

The whole space really came together with these touches. Not to mention she was on top of everything and managed to spend time in the group discussions as well.

Meanwhile, Sophie cooked and baked her way into all of our hearts. Her meals were healthy, light, satisfying, and perfectly suited to everyone’s dietary needs.

I mean, common. That lunch looks like a Bon Appetit spread.

She also made clementine cake which was a big hit among many other awesome dishes.

I’ll be honest, Sophie’s adorable personality and gourmet menu has set a high bar for future Foodies.

Here’s some more goodness: she’ll be sharing the recipes from the weekend in the coming weeks on her blog so we can all make our own Sophie meals.

Another element that made the weekend truly special was the vintage china. Phebe of Making Me Events lent her mix and match vintage plates. It was incredible to have such beautiful pieces to serve and sip from.

Plus, she is one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met.

In each of the tea cups we were also blessed to have hot chocolate from The Ticket Kitchen.

Though the hot chocolate is awesome on it’s own, we got a little creative and turned them into flavored mochas by mixing them with coffee.

Then there were the goodie bags.

My Commander in Chief, Jen, decided to take things to the next level by reaching out to small businesses.

So in addition to Jess LC totes, we had super cute little letterpress care packages sent by Sarah of Parrott Design Studio.

(If you are a small business owner looking to share your goodies at future workshops, please reach out to Jen at hello(at)with-intention.com.)

Tomorrow or Thursday (depending on my travel tomorrow back to Chicago) I’ll go over the workshop content itself.

For now, I’d like to thank the wonderful women mentioned above who made our time so memorable.

photos via and via

Tomorrow’s Wish I Knew Wednesday is a special edition which is going to be as informative for me as it is for you.

You see, I have been interested in creating an e-book but have no real clue how to take my content and bring it to life in an e-book format.

And I’m guessing other WIKW readers may be feeling the same way.

So the minute I saw Serena Faber Nelson’s incredible e-book, 52 Weeks of Treats, I knew she was the lady we all could learn from.

Not only is her content solid, but her visuals “take the [puppy] cake.”

(Sorry, I had to.)

Thankfully, Serena has agreed to share her insights and top 10 tips for crafting an excellent e-book with us all.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

photo via

Tomorrow on Wish I Knew Wednesday I’ll be sharing the ways that I have found virtual and non-virtual assistants over the past five years.

This is somewhat of a follow-up to the great response that I got from last week’s edition about sharing an inbox with an assistant. Many people have followed up and asked me how I found my assistant or suggest they do the same (this is a very frequent topic with my clients, too).

So if you are looking to bring on extra help – now or in the future – stay tuned to your inbox.

If you’d like to get the email, simply sign up by clicking on the image below. This email list is also where I announce upcoming workshops and other Business With Intention updates.

(If you have signed up for the Wish I Knew Wednesday newsletter, you will automatically get this email.)

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