Over the past few weeks I’ve received several emails from MML readers who are in the process of finding their purpose and next stage in their life. This murky and dark time can be overwhelming, scary, and seeking advice usually seems to be the best course of action. “If I don’t know what I’m supposed to do yet, maybe someone else can help me figure it out.” But the complete truth is only you know the answer to what you are supposed to do, it comes from deep down inside. Time, reflection, and making under our lives allows us to hear and follow the voice from within.
Today and tomorrow I will share letters I have written to Purpose Seekers in hopes that others facing similar situations will see a bit of themselves in the letters and find a calm place to stop and reflect during their journey. Enjoy!
Dear Purpose Seeker,
It was great hearing your story – you have lived quite an adventure and you should be proud of yourself for jumping into so many awesome opportunities so quickly, at such a young age. I think this is going to serve you well in the future, and something to be proud of first and foremost.
That said, I think it goes without saying that I have no magical potion for you (not that you expected one) that can help you with the next phase of your life and finding your purpose. In fact, no one has the answer. It actually lies deep in your gut in a quiet and calm place. If that voice inside deep down hasn’t whispered it to you yet – then it’s just a matter of time (don’t we wish we can just hurry that process up a bit! – unfortunately we can’t).
It definitely sounds like your life is in transition after the relationship and that is okay. I went through a similar phase last year – it was incredibly tough, but I quickly found for me, it was the best thing that could have happened to me in the long run – I just had to simply have faith and believe that was the case before I actually saw that it was true.
So… my recommendations while you are going through this period of unknowing include reading this post about the same topic, finding a way to help others doing something you love – for free. Yep, start helping people in some way that you enjoy to help get your ego off the constant merry-go-round of “what about me? what is going on? why don’t I know my purpose yet? blah, blah, blah” that voice inside your head that is jumping up and down scared is just your ego thinking that it’s easy for people to find their purposes (it’s often not) and tells you that you should be able to figure this out by now (you don’t have to).
You are young, you are adventurous! Don’t let the scared little ego voice in your head let you feel badly about what you have done and where you are going. Recognize that you are going to be working theoretically for decades and that you can do one thing now and change direction when you find out more of your purpose from your spirit! And your life is not defined in and of itself by what you do in your “working hours” there is so much more to your life, you can always start cultivating the other areas so that you are able to enjoy everyday along this journey. Live in this moment, in the not knowing, and have faith that it’s working out for the best.
In fact, if you do believe in any faith I would also turn to that and reflect, journal, pray, or meditate along the way. Documenting your thoughts once or twice a week over time will help you see that you are finding out more and more about what you do want – this will not be a black and white process. When I don’t know what to do (happens all the time) this is the first place that I turn to and honestly, where I spend most of my time until the answers I seek are revealed in some way in my life.
And if all else fails, start reading The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. That’s what I did when I was in the dark about my life five or six years ago and through studying the first three habits for several years my life has honestly changed enormously. Or read any other kind of personal development book that hits home for you (here’s my bookshelf). Start being a better “you” and you’ll find your purpose will will begin to unfold and you’ll be better able to accomplish the tasks ahead.
With all my love and faith,