The great thing about designing a life with intention is that it allows us to reflect on our lives and find ways to move past fears and limiting beliefs.
Without a personal drive to push past our comfort zone, we can end up stalled in some area of our life.
For me, I have created a new intention to push past a very real, but seemingly silly fear: driving.
Over the past decade I have not owned a car or driven more than a handful of times. When I was in high school I shared a blue Blazer with my brother. But I never purchased one in college or in Chicago.
In fact, I chose to live in Chicago partly because I loved the transportation system. I preferred to spend more money on my apartment than splitting my budget on a car and apartment combined.
And even though I was never a bad driver, the sheer lack of driving over the past ten years has left me gun shy.
Yet this never was a big issue because I never had a car.
However, this summer Mr. Lively’s parents generously gifted us their 2006 Toyota Prius.
Which Mr. Lively drives almost exclusively.
He drives it the most because he loves driving and I am afraid to drive, especially in Chicago. The city is much more challenging to navigate than my hometown of Rochester, Michigan where I learned to drive in 2001.
This means my current self-imposed driving ban is now actively limiting potential convenience and my driving independence. And if I really think about it, I believe this also affects my self-confidence more than I’d like to admit.
Sure, I could hide behind valid excuses like taking the bus is better for the environment and cheaper than gas. Which is true. But the deeper truth for me is that I am scared that I will mess up somehow, go down a one-way road the wrong way, or… get honked at.
Yes, I know this sounds so silly. But to me in my head, it really does feel scary.
I have no fear of speaking on national television, sharing my life here on the blog, taking my business full-time after college, ending my business, or a million other things. But the simple act of driving has me worried and leading a limited life.
As the title of this post states, I am quite literally stopping myself from moving forward.
And I want to change that.
Tonight I am going to talk with Mr. Lively about this intention and see if he is cool with me driving us 90% of the time. Long car trips aside, where we share the driving, the short runs can be left to me. This will help me to feel more confident. Over time, I hope that I will feel more comfortable driving on my own.
Once I am driving solo easily, he can regain the drivers seat on our shared trips.
I have a feeling that if I don’t take these proactive steps now to get more familiar with driving in the city, I will prolong the undue worry and continue to limit myself. Plus, I’ll never actually be getting better at driving in the city – which is really all I need to prove to myself in the first place.
As I take these next steps to push myself out of the passenger seat in my life, I encourage anyone else who is limiting themselves in some way to move past their fears with me.
We can do this. We just gotta start with an intention and take it one step at a time.