*To submit a question for me to answer in next week’s Q&A post, leave it in a comment!*
As much as I love blogging and what it’s done for my business (starting it, for one thing!), the internet can start to feel like high school sometimes.
I remembered this the other day, while seeing that another blogger had gotten a pretty prominent feature on a big site. And while I like that blogger a lot, I couldn’t help but feel jealous and frustrated. “It’s not fair!” I whined to myself (and the cat), “I should be on there!”
You know, like a bratty teenager.
The internet has its popular girls. And you and me and everyone else (yes I’m generalizing) looks at “the cool table” and wonders when they’re gonna make it there.Â And seeing one of your buddies get that coveted invitation… well, you feel good for her and kinda hate her at the same time. Not that I’m particularly proud of this… I just have a feeling that some of you may have experienced something similar. Wishing and hoping for approval and to be deemed worthy.
And you can’t forget the “new girl”. The blog that comes out of nowhere and seems to be an overnight success. “How was that so EASY for her?” you wonder. There may or may not be desperate attempts to “get in” with her before she figures out you’re not one of the cool girls. Ahem.
But since it’s been a while since I actually was in high school (almost 9 years if you’re counting), I do have a little bit of insight to how to combat the popularity ladder… at least in your mind and attitude. See, in high school, we didn’t really realize that the popular girls were insecure too. They may be aware that they’re popular, but they’re human just like the rest of us and are probably pinching themselves and hoping it doesn’t all just disappear. This completely goes for bloggers too (think she’s always wearing those stilettos and Chanel, or is she in her pj’s just like you?). Also, your “level” of popularity is totally dependent on perspective. I may sometimes feel like a grade A first class loser sitting at the freshman table, but to that girl over there, I’m doing really well. She wishes her blog were as successful as my blog, even while I wish mine was as successful as the homecoming queen’s.
As my analogy falls apart, my message is that everyone feels like they are, at times, at the complete bottom of the totem pole. Like there is so far to climb and that you’re getting passed over by the new-girls of the world. That everyone else is more successful, has more opportunities, and has the hottest boyfriend (ok, slipping back into that analogy!). But everyone experiences those feelings.
I wish that I’d spent less time in high school wanting to be popular and had just taken some chances and not been so scared. I would have tried out for cheerleading. I would have joined the school newspaper. I would have taken more art classes. I would have talked to the boys that I considered “out of my league”. And you know what? Now that I have a business and a blog, I get a second chance to (ahem) flip the bird to popularity and take those chances. Nope, not picking up the pom pom’s anytime soon, but go after the dreams that are important to me now and not wondering if I’ll “fit in”. Popularity and success will find me, instead of me chasing them.
Anyone else sometimes feel like blogging is like high school? Now that you’re not 17 anymore, how do you combat those familiar feelings?
P.S. Next week I want to do a special Q&A and answer any questions you have for me – about my business, blogging, interior design, anything you want. Leave your questions in the comment section below or email me at maggie AT maggieroseonline.com. Looking forward to it!